So... I finished round one of the PINK program. I did the reset, as well as phases 1, 2 & 3. When I was done with all of that, I found that while I had completely transformed myself (both inside and outside), I hadn't quite reached my goal.
The PINK progam provides a few suggestions, but the one that seemed to make the most sense for me was to start back at the beginning, and work my way through again.
So, today was day 3 of phase 1, which I'm tackling for the second time, this time with fewer modifications and heavier weights than the first time I went through it. My sister's been joining me with the exercise aspect of things, which provides us the opportunity to both improve our health and spend some time together. She isn't doing the nutrition side of things though, so it'll be interesting to see what exercise by itself can do.
So... here I go again! This time with the confidence and knowledge that what I am doing WILL produce results, and that I will get to where I want to be if I stick to it (Round One involved hard work, yes, but it was accompanied by blind faith and a "fingers crossed" sort of hopefullness). So with that in mind, let Round Two begin!
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Lessons I've Learned
My mother is a wonderful person, and when gift-giving occasions arise, she'd like to receive the perfect card and spend time with loved ones, rather than get a million presents. Knowing this, I recently found myself making my way through the card section, on the hunt for the perfect Mother's Day card for my Mom.
I needed to find a card that expressed a heartfelt sentiment - one where every single word and phrase echoes a sentiment that is true for my Mom. While this is normally so simple feat, I actually narrowed it down to 2 cards that I really liked, then ultimately set them both aside when I finally found the perfect card.
I realized that all of the cards I was drawn to this year (it's different every year) held a similar theme - they all seemed to be about what we learned from our mother. This made me reflect on some of the life lessons I learned from my Mom. Some are things that I learned from her example, and some are things that I decided I would do differently, Because of this, some of the lessons you see may seem to contradict themselves. They're often 2 sides of the same coin. I learned a lot from my mother. She continues to be one of the strongest and kindest people I know. Certainly THE most thoughtful person I know.
There are so many things that my mother taught me, I couldn't possibly list them all. But today, on Mother's Day, I'm thinking about all the lessons I learned from my Mother, that have helped me to be the person I am today.
I needed to find a card that expressed a heartfelt sentiment - one where every single word and phrase echoes a sentiment that is true for my Mom. While this is normally so simple feat, I actually narrowed it down to 2 cards that I really liked, then ultimately set them both aside when I finally found the perfect card.
I realized that all of the cards I was drawn to this year (it's different every year) held a similar theme - they all seemed to be about what we learned from our mother. This made me reflect on some of the life lessons I learned from my Mom. Some are things that I learned from her example, and some are things that I decided I would do differently, Because of this, some of the lessons you see may seem to contradict themselves. They're often 2 sides of the same coin. I learned a lot from my mother. She continues to be one of the strongest and kindest people I know. Certainly THE most thoughtful person I know.
- My mother taught me that kindness matters. That it is ALWAYS worth the time and effort it takes to show someone that you care. It doesn't matter if it will be recognized or appreciated. The simple act of kindness and knowing that you're doing a good thing is enough.
- My mother taught me that you need to stand up for yourself, and ensure that you are treated in the way that you deserve to be. That if you are unhappy with the way you are being treated, you need to step up and SAY something, and if that doesn't work, you need to DO something about it. Allowing it to continue is not a healthy option.
- My mother taught me to think of what everyone needs, and to try to find ways to meet those needs. Whether planning a meal or a vacation, thinking about the needs and wants of each person in the family is important for success.
- My mother taught me to make myself a priority. That it's not only okay for me to speak up and say what I want/need, but that it's important that I do so. That if all you do is give so much of yourself every day and don't make sure your own needs are taken care of, that soon you will have nothing left for anyone.
- My mother taught me to be unafraid. Change can be scary, but continuing on with something that isn't working and NOT changing, is even worse. Being able to recognize when something needs to change and having the courage to make it happen is brave, and amazing, and inspiring.
- My mother taught me that good is the enemy of great. Not in so many words - those words are generic corporate lingo learned years later - but the sentiment is the same. If you simply accept something that is good, you'll never strive to achieve something great, and therefore never maximize potential.
- My mother taught me to always try my best. There's no excuse for mediocre work - it's laziness, plain and simple, which is NOT acceptable. If you aren't going to do your best work, you're wasting everyone's time.
- My mother taught me that a clean house is important for a healthy family, but a tidy house if often more about appearances to others. As long as we know where everything is and our space works for us, that's all that matters. Would I like things to be neat and tidy? Yes. Is it something I am willing to stress out about or sacrifice precious family time for? No.
- My mother taught me that it's important to share what's in your head and your heart - both the good and the bad, but that the when, where & how you share is even more important.
There are so many things that my mother taught me, I couldn't possibly list them all. But today, on Mother's Day, I'm thinking about all the lessons I learned from my Mother, that have helped me to be the person I am today.
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Relaxation
As much as I've often been a lazy person, I've always struggled with the ability to relax. I'm constantly thinking about things, planning things, and yes, occasionally worrying or stressing over things.
I took 3 days off this week. My mom (who is a godsend and watches my kids after school, most days) was playing tour guide-slash-hostess to company from overseas, so I took the time off so my kids would be a non-issue for her during their stay.
While the first day got filled up with "stuff" (not bad stuff, just things to do), yesterday and today held no demands on my time while the kids were in school. I did some very minor tidying, but for the most part, I tried very hard to relax. As I'm also on the "reset" phase of my health program, I also had no workouts to do. I caught up on some shows I enjoy that I hadn't had time to watch recently, cooked myself delicious and healthy lunches, and had some "me time".
It felt awkward and made me feel oddly guilty, like I was doing something wrong, or something I should apologize for. I don't think it's something that I could do all the time... I'd feel useless and unproductive. I will say, though, that on day 2 of my attempt at true relaxation, I'm feeling less awkward with it - like I'm finding my stride. I kinda wish I had another day or two to really practice more with this relaxation thing :)
I took 3 days off this week. My mom (who is a godsend and watches my kids after school, most days) was playing tour guide-slash-hostess to company from overseas, so I took the time off so my kids would be a non-issue for her during their stay.
While the first day got filled up with "stuff" (not bad stuff, just things to do), yesterday and today held no demands on my time while the kids were in school. I did some very minor tidying, but for the most part, I tried very hard to relax. As I'm also on the "reset" phase of my health program, I also had no workouts to do. I caught up on some shows I enjoy that I hadn't had time to watch recently, cooked myself delicious and healthy lunches, and had some "me time".
It felt awkward and made me feel oddly guilty, like I was doing something wrong, or something I should apologize for. I don't think it's something that I could do all the time... I'd feel useless and unproductive. I will say, though, that on day 2 of my attempt at true relaxation, I'm feeling less awkward with it - like I'm finding my stride. I kinda wish I had another day or two to really practice more with this relaxation thing :)
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Milestones
A number of people I work with are currently focused on health and wellness. I can't speak for them, but for me, when I say that, I'm referring to reducing my overall circumference.
Something that has come up during these group conversations is "celebrating" milestones. At the 5lb, 10lb, 20lb, or whatever that might be. It might be a pedicure, or a facial, or a pair of shoes. It might be something as simple as a quiet night with a good book and a bubble bath.
Beyond these mini-rewards, we do, of course, have our BIG reward at the end (not just the great bodies we wanted, but something more to look forward to). For some it's a vacation, for me, it's a whole new wardrobe full of fabulous, flattering clothes.
Today, I hit what I would consider a milestone. Having been on this journey for just a few days past the 3-month mark, I've now lost 40lbs. While it's unfortunate that I allowed myself to reach the point where I had so much excess body weight to lose, I think I will appreciate my new body more, having worked so hard to achieve it. My journey's not done yet, but I look and feel better than I can remember in the last 15 years, and I'm proud of myself for having reached this milestone.
Something that has come up during these group conversations is "celebrating" milestones. At the 5lb, 10lb, 20lb, or whatever that might be. It might be a pedicure, or a facial, or a pair of shoes. It might be something as simple as a quiet night with a good book and a bubble bath.
Beyond these mini-rewards, we do, of course, have our BIG reward at the end (not just the great bodies we wanted, but something more to look forward to). For some it's a vacation, for me, it's a whole new wardrobe full of fabulous, flattering clothes.
Today, I hit what I would consider a milestone. Having been on this journey for just a few days past the 3-month mark, I've now lost 40lbs. While it's unfortunate that I allowed myself to reach the point where I had so much excess body weight to lose, I think I will appreciate my new body more, having worked so hard to achieve it. My journey's not done yet, but I look and feel better than I can remember in the last 15 years, and I'm proud of myself for having reached this milestone.
Monday, May 7, 2012
Temptation
Temptation is something that's always there - always will be. We can give in to it or overcome it, but it's there, and isn't always easy to ignore.
I've been working my way along my wellness journey for just over 3 months now. Most days are easy - the simple fact is that the healthy habits have become just that - habit. The thought of eating unhealthy foods usually doesn't even cross my mind just because it simply isn't an option for me, and hasn't been for quite some time now. This is both a blessing and a curse. It's a blessing because I don't have to "overcome" things or struggle with them or feel deprived, because it isn't even a thought or consideration for me. It's a curse because when those thoughts do come to me... when I'm unable to ignore things and I'm truly tempted, I feel ill-equipped to handle it.
This weekend was like that... It seemed that every where I turned, there were delicious temptations available to me. Now, anyone that knows me, knows that I have a sweet tooth - and that the term "sweet tooth" is a major understatement as it applies to me. Chocolate, in particular, has a special place in my heart.
So I encounter:
I finally shook myself out of my reverie, and hastily made my way to the checkout and out of the store - without the cookie dough :).
Most of the time, I have no problem making the choices that I should be making - ones that bring me closer to my goal, rather than further away. Weekends and days like these, though, serve to remind me that temptation will always be out there, and I need to be ready to handle it. While perhaps I did "handle it" this time, here's hoping that next time I handle temptation with a little more grace, and a little less fantasizing about cookie dough :)
I've been working my way along my wellness journey for just over 3 months now. Most days are easy - the simple fact is that the healthy habits have become just that - habit. The thought of eating unhealthy foods usually doesn't even cross my mind just because it simply isn't an option for me, and hasn't been for quite some time now. This is both a blessing and a curse. It's a blessing because I don't have to "overcome" things or struggle with them or feel deprived, because it isn't even a thought or consideration for me. It's a curse because when those thoughts do come to me... when I'm unable to ignore things and I'm truly tempted, I feel ill-equipped to handle it.
This weekend was like that... It seemed that every where I turned, there were delicious temptations available to me. Now, anyone that knows me, knows that I have a sweet tooth - and that the term "sweet tooth" is a major understatement as it applies to me. Chocolate, in particular, has a special place in my heart.
So I encounter:
- chocolate easter bunnies (the 1-lb, solid variety, which would be delightful dipped in peanut butter...mmmmm)
- chewy/gooey cookies containing both chocolate chips and mini peanut-butter cups
- nanaimo bars
- boston cream pie (which seems more like a cake than a pie, but whatever...)
- those peanut butter balls that have rice crispies in them and are covered with chocolate
- chocolate covered strawberries
- butter tart squares
- date squares
- cheesecake
- chocolate torte
- chocolate lava cake
- those soft "turnover" cookies made by Voortman
I finally shook myself out of my reverie, and hastily made my way to the checkout and out of the store - without the cookie dough :).
Most of the time, I have no problem making the choices that I should be making - ones that bring me closer to my goal, rather than further away. Weekends and days like these, though, serve to remind me that temptation will always be out there, and I need to be ready to handle it. While perhaps I did "handle it" this time, here's hoping that next time I handle temptation with a little more grace, and a little less fantasizing about cookie dough :)
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Wallow
I have occasionally been known to wallow. It's self-indulgent and unproductive, but from time to time, nothing appeals to me more.
There are some things I take in stride, and others that I view simply as a challenge for me to conquer, knowing that I will prevail. Sometimes, though, it can be difficult to simply bounce-back from a hitch in your stride. Sometimes all I want to do is wallow and dwell. Negative, I know. It doesn't happen often, and it isn't always anything big. It can simply be that plans for an evening didn't quite go as I'd hoped. Not that they were bad, just not exactly what I wanted, and next thing I know - boom - wallowing.
Today was like that. My wallowing took up a great deal of my time. I knew I needed to bounce-back and get on with things, but I simply couldn't find the motivation.
Here's hoping that a good night's sleep refreshes and resets things. This wallow's been alright, but I'm done with it, for now :)
There are some things I take in stride, and others that I view simply as a challenge for me to conquer, knowing that I will prevail. Sometimes, though, it can be difficult to simply bounce-back from a hitch in your stride. Sometimes all I want to do is wallow and dwell. Negative, I know. It doesn't happen often, and it isn't always anything big. It can simply be that plans for an evening didn't quite go as I'd hoped. Not that they were bad, just not exactly what I wanted, and next thing I know - boom - wallowing.
Today was like that. My wallowing took up a great deal of my time. I knew I needed to bounce-back and get on with things, but I simply couldn't find the motivation.
Here's hoping that a good night's sleep refreshes and resets things. This wallow's been alright, but I'm done with it, for now :)
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Strong
It's been a month since I last posted. If it weren't for my friend pointing out the fact that I've been neglecting my blog, I might've missed the month of April altogether.
I feel confident. The confidence I have in myself is something I can't remember having before - ever. I feel good about the changes that I'm making. I know what I want and what I don't want. I have a clear vision about the path I'm on to get me to where I want to be.
I've always felt insecure, and inferior to those around me. I've always felt intimidated by people who were confident, and for some reason, valued myself as being "less than" most other people. I guess I figured that they seemed to know what they were all about. Not me - I might have had an idea, or a thought, but I never had the confidence to truly know - so I would simply fall in line with others - because if they know the answers so well, and they know what to do, then who am I to say otherwise?
What started off with my weight loss journey has transformed not only my body, but my entire life. I have found my voice. I sometimes have to watch myself to prevent me from going to the other extreme, where my confidence wants to creep into arrogance. I am challenging people, and speaking up when I don't agree. I care less about what others think of me, because I have a better opinion of myself. I used to think so little of myself that I needed the validation from others to make me feel like I was okay, or of value. I don't need that anymore. I'm finding out who I am, and being proud of who I am. I don't hide it, and I don't apologize for it. People may like me or they might not - It doesn't matter. That may seem like a small thing for anyone reading this, but to me, it's completely liberating. It means I'm no longer living my life for someone else - I'm doing it for me, and doing it the way I want to.
My family and friends have been amazingly supportive, throughout my entire journey (which is not yet done - I'm 60% of the way toward achieving my goal). I think I initially took this for granted, but I now see how not everyone has this. I see how sometimes, when someone is trying to better themselves, even the people they are closest to may become "naysayers" and try to drag them back down. I understand the others' motivations - fear, guilt, and several others in between, but even while I understand it, it still makes me sad.
I'm a stronger person than I was 3 months ago. Strong both physically and emotionally. I like who I am, and who I'm on my way to becoming. Fingers crossed that I continue to have the strength to finish my journey and reach my goals.
I feel confident. The confidence I have in myself is something I can't remember having before - ever. I feel good about the changes that I'm making. I know what I want and what I don't want. I have a clear vision about the path I'm on to get me to where I want to be.
I've always felt insecure, and inferior to those around me. I've always felt intimidated by people who were confident, and for some reason, valued myself as being "less than" most other people. I guess I figured that they seemed to know what they were all about. Not me - I might have had an idea, or a thought, but I never had the confidence to truly know - so I would simply fall in line with others - because if they know the answers so well, and they know what to do, then who am I to say otherwise?
What started off with my weight loss journey has transformed not only my body, but my entire life. I have found my voice. I sometimes have to watch myself to prevent me from going to the other extreme, where my confidence wants to creep into arrogance. I am challenging people, and speaking up when I don't agree. I care less about what others think of me, because I have a better opinion of myself. I used to think so little of myself that I needed the validation from others to make me feel like I was okay, or of value. I don't need that anymore. I'm finding out who I am, and being proud of who I am. I don't hide it, and I don't apologize for it. People may like me or they might not - It doesn't matter. That may seem like a small thing for anyone reading this, but to me, it's completely liberating. It means I'm no longer living my life for someone else - I'm doing it for me, and doing it the way I want to.
My family and friends have been amazingly supportive, throughout my entire journey (which is not yet done - I'm 60% of the way toward achieving my goal). I think I initially took this for granted, but I now see how not everyone has this. I see how sometimes, when someone is trying to better themselves, even the people they are closest to may become "naysayers" and try to drag them back down. I understand the others' motivations - fear, guilt, and several others in between, but even while I understand it, it still makes me sad.
I'm a stronger person than I was 3 months ago. Strong both physically and emotionally. I like who I am, and who I'm on my way to becoming. Fingers crossed that I continue to have the strength to finish my journey and reach my goals.
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