I'm at a point right now where I've got a lot on my mind. Some things I'm ready to write about, others I'm not. When I went to put some of my thoughts down, though, I realized it had been 6 months since I had last posted.
Bearing that in mind, in the interests of providing context to any of my future posts, here's what's new...
Work:
I left my job of 14.5 years to go to work for the client that I had been working with. This has left me with a lot of feelings...
Excitement - because I'm doing something different and new and exciting
Security - because my previous role was likely not going to exist in the long-term future...
Grief - because my relationship with my previous work friends took such a dramatic and unexpected turn and I'm feeling that loss... So much...
Frustration - because the management style and approach is so completely unfamiliar to me...
Worry - because I miss my old colleagues and friends and wonder if I've made a mistake
Relief - because I have a good pension plan and no longer need to worry about how I'm going to manage to survive 30 years from now.
Weight:
Lost 15 of the 20 pounds I had gained back. Still need to exercise, though. I've been managing my weight with food alone thus far, but that isn't going to get me the body I want, only one I can be satisfied with. It's not enough, and I need to give myself a serious kick in the ass and do something about it.
Relationships:
Marriage: Things are, for the most part, really good. Communication is key, and I'm making a point of being VERY clear about where I'm at. I believe this has served us well thus far - that is not to say that there are no conflicts - 'cause let's face it - there will always be some conflict in any marriage. No, it's more that there aren't any misunderstandings. When there's an issue. It's real, and it's valid, and it needs to be resolved. There are no conflicts based on false information or assumptions, though.
Family: My new job is a 2-hour commute away. Oddly enough, this doesn't bother me too much - I actually spend more time with the family than I used to with my old job. I will say, though, that the commute makes the work days themselves much longer than they used to be. For this reason, I feel compelled to make the most of the weekends, since that's the time I really have available to spend with people. This is a shift in the overall dynamic of our family, and one we're each struggling with, at least to some degree.
Friends: I'm making friends more of a priority. Whether it be taking the time to FB message the during my morning commute or touching base in the evenings/weekends when the opportunity presents itself, I'm making more of a point to connect with people. Some are good friends I've had for years. Some are family. Some are old friends I've reconnected with, and some are more like acquaintances whose commonalities with myself have pleasantly surprised me. However I've come to know them, I'm enjoying the connections, even if they are mostly done electronically due to my lifestyle and priorities.
Life, and the pursuit of happiness:
I've also been making plans with friends when I'm not working, recognizing that I am more than a wife, mother, and employee, but I'm also a person who has their own wants, needs, and vision. I'm trying to be a little bit selfish, finally realizing that "because it makes me happy" IS actually reason enough to do something. That my happiness needn't just be a fortunate by-product of a decision made to benefit someone else, but can actually be the primary goal of something - and that that's ok. I'm learning to be a little bit frivolous and am trying to be more spontaneous. Sometimes I love the planning of things, and the anticipation when an event is coming up. Recently, though, I've discovered that it can weigh on me, too - the planning of it all, the having to make it happen, the having to adjust and modify when plans need to change. I've found that having the flexibility and the willingness to simply get up and do something NOW - because the opportunity has presented itself and because you want to - is a lovely thing.
Saturday, August 10, 2013
Friday, February 15, 2013
Expanding our Family
Hubby & I are dog people. We love logs, want dogs, and growing up, we always had a dog in the house.
Now that we're all grown up and have a family of our own, we want to have a couple of dogs. There are a couple of challenges, however, that we haven't been able to fully get past, which is why we haven't yet "pulled the trigger" on the decision to get a dog.
Dogs take time. The time to train them, and to follow through, consistently, with the training, because if you're not going to follow through and be consistent, there's no point in doing it at all, 'cause you won't get the results you're looking for. Time to play with them, groom them, and just be there for them.
Dogs take money. Not only the initial costs, adoption fees or other fees, but also vet fees and obedience training school fees. If you plan on going away for a vacation and don't have someone to dog-sit, kennel fees.
Dogs involve a lifestyle change. You need to be willing to modify your lifestyle significantly, to meet the needs of a dog. Daily walks, being around and available to let the dog out when it needs to go to the bathroom, saying "no" to impromptu getaways that can't accommodate dogs.
So.... what do dog lovers do, who don't have time or money, and who aren't yet ready to commit to a lifestyle overhaul?
They get cats ;)
We have never really given much consideration to cats before, as we are, as mentioned above, dog people. It's not that I dislike cats, not at all... I've just never had one as a pet and I really don't know anything about them, so it isn't something that even entered my radar. Last week, however, as we heard scratching and scurrying in the walls of our old house in the country, hubby suggested that we get a cat (or two). Mouse traps just aren't doing the trick, and our kids would LOVE to have some pets to play with and care for, and nothing seems to be changing regarding those ever-present challenges associated with getting a dog, so we decided to go for it.
The last week has been a whirlwind of getting information (I didn't know how much they eat, how often to change the litter, what kind of food or litter to buy, what they need from us to ensure their needs are met, etc), and luckily our friends have (or have had) cats, so they were able to answer my incessant (and I'm sure ridiculously basic) questions.
So they are set to arrive tomorrow morning... Two six-month old kittens - brothers - who are rescue cats, have been neutered, have had their shots and their claws clipped, and are free! We're going out tonight to get all the accessories and things they will need to get settled into our home, as we get ready to expand our family by two more, and welcome our new fuzzy family members with open arms.
Now that we're all grown up and have a family of our own, we want to have a couple of dogs. There are a couple of challenges, however, that we haven't been able to fully get past, which is why we haven't yet "pulled the trigger" on the decision to get a dog.
Dogs take time. The time to train them, and to follow through, consistently, with the training, because if you're not going to follow through and be consistent, there's no point in doing it at all, 'cause you won't get the results you're looking for. Time to play with them, groom them, and just be there for them.
Dogs take money. Not only the initial costs, adoption fees or other fees, but also vet fees and obedience training school fees. If you plan on going away for a vacation and don't have someone to dog-sit, kennel fees.
Dogs involve a lifestyle change. You need to be willing to modify your lifestyle significantly, to meet the needs of a dog. Daily walks, being around and available to let the dog out when it needs to go to the bathroom, saying "no" to impromptu getaways that can't accommodate dogs.
So.... what do dog lovers do, who don't have time or money, and who aren't yet ready to commit to a lifestyle overhaul?
They get cats ;)
We have never really given much consideration to cats before, as we are, as mentioned above, dog people. It's not that I dislike cats, not at all... I've just never had one as a pet and I really don't know anything about them, so it isn't something that even entered my radar. Last week, however, as we heard scratching and scurrying in the walls of our old house in the country, hubby suggested that we get a cat (or two). Mouse traps just aren't doing the trick, and our kids would LOVE to have some pets to play with and care for, and nothing seems to be changing regarding those ever-present challenges associated with getting a dog, so we decided to go for it.
The last week has been a whirlwind of getting information (I didn't know how much they eat, how often to change the litter, what kind of food or litter to buy, what they need from us to ensure their needs are met, etc), and luckily our friends have (or have had) cats, so they were able to answer my incessant (and I'm sure ridiculously basic) questions.
So they are set to arrive tomorrow morning... Two six-month old kittens - brothers - who are rescue cats, have been neutered, have had their shots and their claws clipped, and are free! We're going out tonight to get all the accessories and things they will need to get settled into our home, as we get ready to expand our family by two more, and welcome our new fuzzy family members with open arms.
Monday, February 11, 2013
Exercise
It was February of Last year that I started this blog. This same time last year that I began my weight-loss journey, and I'm still on that journey today.
I've now reached the next stage of the "PINK Method", and am therefore introducing both exercise, and some slow-burning carbs. I've been dreading the former, and looking forward to the latter.
The truth is, I HATE exercise - I hate the process, but I love the results, and I know that I will never see any lasting transformation unless it has a permanent place in my lifestyle. It's a necessary evil.
I truly wish that I could be one of those people (whom I generally find immeasurably irritating) that LOVES to exercise. They love the challenge, they love sweating, they love knowing that they're pushing themselves harder and further than they have before. They get a sense of accomplishment from it. They zone out while running, almost engaged in a moving meditation.
Alas, I don't think I'll ever be one of those people, and therein lies the problem. I read somewhere that when you struggle with your weight, unless you learn to LOVE exercise, you will ALWAYS struggle with your weight. You will slack off when you reach a size that you're content with, then have to start over again once you notice that you're slipping back into old habits (and into your older, larger-size jeans). The article encouraged the reader to explore all kinds of different fitness classes and active lifestyle options, with the objective of finding one that they enjoyed. After all, if you enjoy something, you're much more likely to get up and do it, because you WANT to do it.
This makes a lot of sense to me, and also fills me with panic. I've tried so many different types of classes, and none of them really appeal to me. They're all WORK - and for me, not a labor of love. So I'm left with a low-lying worry that I try not to listen to very often... Will I always struggle with my weight? Am I destined to watch the scale and my clothing size bobble back and forth, because the idea of excercising makes me want to curl up and take a nap?
I'm trying to block out those thoughts - those are the ones that discourage me and try to make me quit before I even start. Instead, I'm going to focus on the immediate benefits that come along with exercise (not the long-term ones, as those don't give the instant gratification that i'm all about). The vanilla and sweet almond-scented body wash that I get to use when I'm done my post-workout shower... My rich and delicious chocolate-banana post-workout smoothie... These are the things that keep me on track right now, and make me get up and do my workout. I wish I could think of more, but for now, that's all I got :)
I've now reached the next stage of the "PINK Method", and am therefore introducing both exercise, and some slow-burning carbs. I've been dreading the former, and looking forward to the latter.
The truth is, I HATE exercise - I hate the process, but I love the results, and I know that I will never see any lasting transformation unless it has a permanent place in my lifestyle. It's a necessary evil.
I truly wish that I could be one of those people (whom I generally find immeasurably irritating) that LOVES to exercise. They love the challenge, they love sweating, they love knowing that they're pushing themselves harder and further than they have before. They get a sense of accomplishment from it. They zone out while running, almost engaged in a moving meditation.
Alas, I don't think I'll ever be one of those people, and therein lies the problem. I read somewhere that when you struggle with your weight, unless you learn to LOVE exercise, you will ALWAYS struggle with your weight. You will slack off when you reach a size that you're content with, then have to start over again once you notice that you're slipping back into old habits (and into your older, larger-size jeans). The article encouraged the reader to explore all kinds of different fitness classes and active lifestyle options, with the objective of finding one that they enjoyed. After all, if you enjoy something, you're much more likely to get up and do it, because you WANT to do it.
This makes a lot of sense to me, and also fills me with panic. I've tried so many different types of classes, and none of them really appeal to me. They're all WORK - and for me, not a labor of love. So I'm left with a low-lying worry that I try not to listen to very often... Will I always struggle with my weight? Am I destined to watch the scale and my clothing size bobble back and forth, because the idea of excercising makes me want to curl up and take a nap?
I'm trying to block out those thoughts - those are the ones that discourage me and try to make me quit before I even start. Instead, I'm going to focus on the immediate benefits that come along with exercise (not the long-term ones, as those don't give the instant gratification that i'm all about). The vanilla and sweet almond-scented body wash that I get to use when I'm done my post-workout shower... My rich and delicious chocolate-banana post-workout smoothie... These are the things that keep me on track right now, and make me get up and do my workout. I wish I could think of more, but for now, that's all I got :)
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Beginning with the End in Mind
I'm an idea-junkie. I hear ideas, I identify with them, I get excited about them, and I want to make them happen.
The reality, though, is that "making it happen" involves follow-through and work, and that sometimes once you find yourself in the midst of the follow through and work, you've lost the excitement that made you start in the first place.
I will say, that my husband is wonderfully patient and understanding, and that he always supports my ideas, knowing that some will come to fruition, and others will not. He doesn't say "yeah, right" or "we'll see if it actually happens"... He says "that sounds cool" or "neat idea!". I have a million ideas (very few are my own, as I'm not a very creative person by nature) and I would like to implement some of them. All of them are worthwhile.... all of them have benefits that i would like to reap... but they cannot all be implemented at the same time, and so if I'm to be successful, I must both prioritize, and do what I can to maintain the excitement I feel when I begin.
I think working toward two goals, each focusing on a different area of my life, is absolutely feasible. With that in mind, I'm pursuing my weight-loss/health goal, and a de-cluttering goal. I have specific plans and methods to achieve each of these goals... a step-by-step guide, if you will, which will help me to be successful.
With each of these goals, I need to remain focused, every single day, on why I want to achieve the goal - the light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak. When I lose sight of my destination, I find myself derailed, and I get off track. I need to begin with the end in mind, and not lose sight of it - not even for a minute.
The reality, though, is that "making it happen" involves follow-through and work, and that sometimes once you find yourself in the midst of the follow through and work, you've lost the excitement that made you start in the first place.
I will say, that my husband is wonderfully patient and understanding, and that he always supports my ideas, knowing that some will come to fruition, and others will not. He doesn't say "yeah, right" or "we'll see if it actually happens"... He says "that sounds cool" or "neat idea!". I have a million ideas (very few are my own, as I'm not a very creative person by nature) and I would like to implement some of them. All of them are worthwhile.... all of them have benefits that i would like to reap... but they cannot all be implemented at the same time, and so if I'm to be successful, I must both prioritize, and do what I can to maintain the excitement I feel when I begin.
I think working toward two goals, each focusing on a different area of my life, is absolutely feasible. With that in mind, I'm pursuing my weight-loss/health goal, and a de-cluttering goal. I have specific plans and methods to achieve each of these goals... a step-by-step guide, if you will, which will help me to be successful.
With each of these goals, I need to remain focused, every single day, on why I want to achieve the goal - the light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak. When I lose sight of my destination, I find myself derailed, and I get off track. I need to begin with the end in mind, and not lose sight of it - not even for a minute.
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
Slipping and Falling
So... I'm back on the saddle again, or at least I was for the last week and a half.
I'm working the PINK Method lifestyle again. Got through the "Reset" phase until the evening of Day 9, at which point I crashed and burned. Carbo-loading and indulging.
You'd think that after 9 days of very low carbs, that the experience would be gratifying and satisfying, but no - it wasn't. And today? I'm left to deal with the aftermath, both on the scale, and with my body, which has no idea what's going on and is a mess today.
Why is it that at times, the allure of a particular food item seems more tempting and more rewarding, somehow, than the goals that we would achieve if we were to avoid it? Why is it that despite all we've learned, we repeat the same mistakes? Why does short-term thinking and the inclination to achieve instant gratification override everything else that we KNOW we want?
So I slip and fall, because I'm human, and I make mistakes. I pick myself up, brush myself off and get back in the saddle because I'm ME. :)
I'm working the PINK Method lifestyle again. Got through the "Reset" phase until the evening of Day 9, at which point I crashed and burned. Carbo-loading and indulging.
You'd think that after 9 days of very low carbs, that the experience would be gratifying and satisfying, but no - it wasn't. And today? I'm left to deal with the aftermath, both on the scale, and with my body, which has no idea what's going on and is a mess today.
Why is it that at times, the allure of a particular food item seems more tempting and more rewarding, somehow, than the goals that we would achieve if we were to avoid it? Why is it that despite all we've learned, we repeat the same mistakes? Why does short-term thinking and the inclination to achieve instant gratification override everything else that we KNOW we want?
So I slip and fall, because I'm human, and I make mistakes. I pick myself up, brush myself off and get back in the saddle because I'm ME. :)
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Goals...
I continue to struggle with defining my goals for 2013. I went on a search for podcasts to see if something would jump out and bite me, and I listened to a few different ones, in the interests of finding one or two that speak to me.
While doing do, one thing I heard that definitely resonated with me, was the idea of spending a half hour a day on personal growth and development. At first this seemed daunting... there aren't enough hours in a day as it is, so how can I come up with another half hour? But then I gave some consideration to multitasking.
There are a lot of elecronic resources available now, between podcasts and books/training on CDs... that this is something you can do while you do other things. Whether it be learning a language or listening to a lifecoach podcast, a half hour a day can be carved out while doing dishes, while waiting for anything, while driving to/from work or while enjoying your morning coffee.
So while I still haven't defined my goals for the year, I am committing to spending 30 minutes a day on personal development - and hopefully that will lead to me figuring out what I want to do next :)
While doing do, one thing I heard that definitely resonated with me, was the idea of spending a half hour a day on personal growth and development. At first this seemed daunting... there aren't enough hours in a day as it is, so how can I come up with another half hour? But then I gave some consideration to multitasking.
There are a lot of elecronic resources available now, between podcasts and books/training on CDs... that this is something you can do while you do other things. Whether it be learning a language or listening to a lifecoach podcast, a half hour a day can be carved out while doing dishes, while waiting for anything, while driving to/from work or while enjoying your morning coffee.
So while I still haven't defined my goals for the year, I am committing to spending 30 minutes a day on personal development - and hopefully that will lead to me figuring out what I want to do next :)
Friday, January 18, 2013
Looking Forward
Now that I'm well entrenched in the new year, I've been giving some consideration to what I want the year to bring.
I've been trying and casting aside a couple of ideas, none of which seem sustainable or ring true to the person I am, and the person I want to be.
I tend to be a goal-oriented and results-driven person, so I've put a lot of pressure on myself to define goals - after all, as of right now, I have only 11.5 months to reach them, and the clock's ticking. Having said that, beyond knowing what my goal weight is, I have nothing defined. I have some vague sense of what I'd like my life to be like, and I guess this year will be about trying to make things more closely resemble that vision.
I'd like a life filled with laughter and silliness, with security and love. I'd like to feel at peace with myself, so that my actions are inline with my ideals. Vague sentiments, right? To turn this into action, I guess I need to figure out what's happening now that ISN'T in line with those things - what's prevented me from achieving this in the past - then take steps to change those factors. Hmmm... so much to think about...
Tick-tock, tick-tock....
I've been trying and casting aside a couple of ideas, none of which seem sustainable or ring true to the person I am, and the person I want to be.
I tend to be a goal-oriented and results-driven person, so I've put a lot of pressure on myself to define goals - after all, as of right now, I have only 11.5 months to reach them, and the clock's ticking. Having said that, beyond knowing what my goal weight is, I have nothing defined. I have some vague sense of what I'd like my life to be like, and I guess this year will be about trying to make things more closely resemble that vision.
I'd like a life filled with laughter and silliness, with security and love. I'd like to feel at peace with myself, so that my actions are inline with my ideals. Vague sentiments, right? To turn this into action, I guess I need to figure out what's happening now that ISN'T in line with those things - what's prevented me from achieving this in the past - then take steps to change those factors. Hmmm... so much to think about...
Tick-tock, tick-tock....
Monday, December 31, 2012
Looking Back
As I look back over 2012, I reviewed my blog posts over the year... I came across one I made back in February about the areas of my life on my "needs improvement" list. I began "assessing" these aspects of my life to determine what progress I had made. I figure as I move in to 2013, I should take stock of what I accomplished in 2012, and take things from there.
Overall, 2012 was a great year, filled with many improvements. I'm better off than I was at the start of the year. My family is better off than they were at the start of the year. I now have the buy-in from the family, who understand that while change may feel uncomfortable and may involve some work and sacrifices, the results are absolutely worth it.
I haven't actually defined any specific goals for 2013, but I look forward to continuing to improve my life and the lives of my family in whatever ways we can. Looking back over the last year helps me to look forward to the next with confidence that I WILL meet my goals if I continue to work toward them.
- My health/my weight
- My job satisfaction
- My living space
- My financial situation
- My family
Overall, 2012 was a great year, filled with many improvements. I'm better off than I was at the start of the year. My family is better off than they were at the start of the year. I now have the buy-in from the family, who understand that while change may feel uncomfortable and may involve some work and sacrifices, the results are absolutely worth it.
I haven't actually defined any specific goals for 2013, but I look forward to continuing to improve my life and the lives of my family in whatever ways we can. Looking back over the last year helps me to look forward to the next with confidence that I WILL meet my goals if I continue to work toward them.
Monday, December 24, 2012
Thankful
I know it's Christmas, and not Thanksgiving, but I find myself looking back at the events of the last year and feeling really good about things.
This year, I'm healthier and stronger than I've ever been. I have clear goals and I know what will bring me closer to my goals, and what moves me further away. I know that I CAN be the person I want to be.
I have a good job, that pays me fairly for the work I do. I like the work I do - it offers a good balance of new challenges, while also having a basic routine so I can go on "auto-pilot" for a bit if I want to. I have the opportunity to work as much overtime as I like to boost the paycheque, but I rarely HAVE to work OT. I have the flexibility to work when I want, and where I want, so that I have a work/life balance that suits my family's needs.
I have 2 great kids that I love and who make me proud every day. I've watched them grow up to be these amazing people that I not only love, but actually like. I enjoy spending time hanging out with them - finding out what they think about things. I love that they have their own thoughts and ideas and unique views and interpretations about the world around us.
I have a wonderful husband who appreciates me and genuinely wants to see me happy. He is not afraid to admit when he's wrong, or to ask for help when the need arises. After being together for almost 18 years, we are still as much in love as we were in high school.
Our finances are stabilizing. While we're nowhere near where we ultimately want to be, we know what we need to do to get there, and we're steadfastly moving in that direction. We are working together to move toward our financial goals, and we're feeling less stress about money because we're more in control of it.
I have a great support system of family and friends who only want good things for me and who are always ready and willing to help in any way they can. I know that I wouldn't be where I am today if it weren't for having them in my life.
Looking back over 2012, I realize how fortunate I am, and I am incredibly thankful for everything good in my life.
This year, I'm healthier and stronger than I've ever been. I have clear goals and I know what will bring me closer to my goals, and what moves me further away. I know that I CAN be the person I want to be.
I have a good job, that pays me fairly for the work I do. I like the work I do - it offers a good balance of new challenges, while also having a basic routine so I can go on "auto-pilot" for a bit if I want to. I have the opportunity to work as much overtime as I like to boost the paycheque, but I rarely HAVE to work OT. I have the flexibility to work when I want, and where I want, so that I have a work/life balance that suits my family's needs.
I have 2 great kids that I love and who make me proud every day. I've watched them grow up to be these amazing people that I not only love, but actually like. I enjoy spending time hanging out with them - finding out what they think about things. I love that they have their own thoughts and ideas and unique views and interpretations about the world around us.
I have a wonderful husband who appreciates me and genuinely wants to see me happy. He is not afraid to admit when he's wrong, or to ask for help when the need arises. After being together for almost 18 years, we are still as much in love as we were in high school.
Our finances are stabilizing. While we're nowhere near where we ultimately want to be, we know what we need to do to get there, and we're steadfastly moving in that direction. We are working together to move toward our financial goals, and we're feeling less stress about money because we're more in control of it.
I have a great support system of family and friends who only want good things for me and who are always ready and willing to help in any way they can. I know that I wouldn't be where I am today if it weren't for having them in my life.
Looking back over 2012, I realize how fortunate I am, and I am incredibly thankful for everything good in my life.
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Anticipation
I've had a week filled with positive thinking, good vibes, and excitement. Nothing really big has happened, nothing too fabulous, but I found myself feeling uplifted by the smallest things - the little things that make life nice.
One contributing factor to my overall lightheartedness is, I'm sure, the wonderfulness that is November. This particular November, in addition to including my birthday, as usual, also brings with it a number of getaway(s). There have been no vacations or even weekend trips this year, for a number of reasons. Now, however, they seem to be coming back-to-back.
So far, I've been successful - between a focus on how I WANT things to be, and the anticipation of so many exciting things happening at once, things are really looking up.
One contributing factor to my overall lightheartedness is, I'm sure, the wonderfulness that is November. This particular November, in addition to including my birthday, as usual, also brings with it a number of getaway(s). There have been no vacations or even weekend trips this year, for a number of reasons. Now, however, they seem to be coming back-to-back.
- Last week, our family spent the night at a hotel not too far away, for "Sleep Cheap" - A charity event sponsored by several hotels in the area, where for a small fee, local residents can stay and enjoy their facilities, with all of the proceeds going to a good cause.
- This coming up weekend, hubby is taking me away for a "surprise" getaway, just the two of us. Destination is unknown - I just pack my bags, get in the car, and see where he takes me. He made arrangements for the kids for the weekend, so it's just he and I, with both the time and opportunity to reconnect.
- Immediately following this weekend getaway, the whole family is going away on a vacation. It's an all-inclusive "dude ranch"-type resort, and we're really looking forward to it. The "no electronics - including cell phones" mandate has been communicated to each person in my family, and everyone's on board with this. It's time to reconnect as a family, as well - and this will be the perfect time and place to do it.
So far, I've been successful - between a focus on how I WANT things to be, and the anticipation of so many exciting things happening at once, things are really looking up.
Monday, November 19, 2012
Transformation
2012 has been a year of transformation for me. I've transformed by body, my thoughts, my relationships, my behaviours - my life.
This is not to say that I was A, and am now C, so my job is done. More that I was A, then I was B, and am now C, and will continue on my journey in the hopes that I will one day be Z.
I need to zero in on things and focus a bit, though. I've got too many balls in the air - too many areas of my life that I'm working on, to the point where my "self-improvements" have begun resembling something along the lines of "jack of all trades - master of none".
I'm working on several things right now, including, but not limited to:
The reality is that I can't do it all at once - I need to prioritize. It's so hard to prioritize between things that you LOVE, though! Which one is less important than the other? Is my emotional well-being more or less important than my physical one? Where to my relationships stand on the priority scale? Some of these involve the participation of others in the family... Does that mean that I should start with ones ONLY requiring me - so I can check them off my list and move on? Or does that mean that I should START with those, since it may take more time to gain their cooperation and implement?
So many questions to ponder and decisions to make as I continue my transformation, and steer my journey into the new year :)
This is not to say that I was A, and am now C, so my job is done. More that I was A, then I was B, and am now C, and will continue on my journey in the hopes that I will one day be Z.
I need to zero in on things and focus a bit, though. I've got too many balls in the air - too many areas of my life that I'm working on, to the point where my "self-improvements" have begun resembling something along the lines of "jack of all trades - master of none".
I'm working on several things right now, including, but not limited to:
- My 100 Thing Challenge - for myself, the house, and the whole family
- P.I.N.K. Method Challenge
- Transforming My Marriage, Without Words
- The Secret - Living with Gratitude - The Laws of Attaction
- Recipe Card Cleaning System
- Maintaining a Minimalist Vision During the Holidays
- Living Simply and Frugally
The reality is that I can't do it all at once - I need to prioritize. It's so hard to prioritize between things that you LOVE, though! Which one is less important than the other? Is my emotional well-being more or less important than my physical one? Where to my relationships stand on the priority scale? Some of these involve the participation of others in the family... Does that mean that I should start with ones ONLY requiring me - so I can check them off my list and move on? Or does that mean that I should START with those, since it may take more time to gain their cooperation and implement?
So many questions to ponder and decisions to make as I continue my transformation, and steer my journey into the new year :)
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Evolution
Do you have one of those people in your life that just knows how to push your buttons? They know you so well, that they can zero in on them with no trouble at all. The ones that seem to go in looking for a fight - and they get one.
I have someone like that. And do you know what? I often responded in a perfectly predictable manner. The simple fact is that I am who I am, so I will react to certain things in certain ways. So this person would steer things down a certain path, and I would get sucked right into it - hook, line & sinker.
Not tonight.
Tonight I decided to temper my response - and bite my tongue. I didn't put a fake smile on things, don't get me wrong. But when things went to a place that I felt was unacceptable or unproductive, I simply and calmly said so. I drew my line very clearly in the sand.
Interesting reaction from the other party.
I threw things off their game - moved them in a different direction. Basically said, "I'm not going to play this game" and decided not to. It feels scary, breaking pattern like that. As much as the old patterns of behaviour were awful, at least they were predictable. They had ther own ebb and flow, and you knew how it would all turn out. It's the uncertainty that scares us away from making a different choice, responding differently, reacting differently. It's scary as hell to take a road not previously taken... a windy and unknown road that you don't know where it leads to.
I'm going down that road now - I'm evolving, and my relationships are evolving... I'm taking the unknown path and hoping for the best - because hope for better things is what drives us to change and move forward.
Here's to the new evolution! May it take me down a better path than the roads previous taken.
I have someone like that. And do you know what? I often responded in a perfectly predictable manner. The simple fact is that I am who I am, so I will react to certain things in certain ways. So this person would steer things down a certain path, and I would get sucked right into it - hook, line & sinker.
Not tonight.
Tonight I decided to temper my response - and bite my tongue. I didn't put a fake smile on things, don't get me wrong. But when things went to a place that I felt was unacceptable or unproductive, I simply and calmly said so. I drew my line very clearly in the sand.
Interesting reaction from the other party.
I threw things off their game - moved them in a different direction. Basically said, "I'm not going to play this game" and decided not to. It feels scary, breaking pattern like that. As much as the old patterns of behaviour were awful, at least they were predictable. They had ther own ebb and flow, and you knew how it would all turn out. It's the uncertainty that scares us away from making a different choice, responding differently, reacting differently. It's scary as hell to take a road not previously taken... a windy and unknown road that you don't know where it leads to.
I'm going down that road now - I'm evolving, and my relationships are evolving... I'm taking the unknown path and hoping for the best - because hope for better things is what drives us to change and move forward.
Here's to the new evolution! May it take me down a better path than the roads previous taken.
Monday, October 22, 2012
The Ability to Overlook
We live in a time where there is so much to do, and not enough time in which to do it. We get creative with our time management, and look for ways to shave things down. Part of this involves deciding what ball needs to get dropped, or what tasks to let slide for awhile.
A main deciding factor in this? The profile of the task. Is it something that is obvious? Will people notice if it isn't done? If so, can the fact that it isn't done be easily justified? If no one will notice, if it's easy to overlook, this is the sort of thing that can slip by the wayside from time to time.
The reality is that far too often, for most of us, we let things go until we just can't ignore, them anymore. There can be any multitude of reasons why we procrastinate: time, money and effort are the biggies.
Didn't get that "check engine" light on the dash checked out, now the car's making horrible noises and you can't wait any longer... would've been simpler, more convenient, and cheaper to take it to the shop before this point, but hey... human nature, right?
Didn't get the bathroom cleaned when it only needed a quick wipe... now you've got surprise guests and it needs to be scrubbed. Should've done it sooner, but because the mess wasn't staring you in the face, it was ignored, and now it's embarrassing.
Didn't exercise regularly because a look in the mirror told you that you looked okay - you didn't need to work out.... Now your muscles have gone soft, you've gained back a few pounds, and your clothes don't fit the same way. Should've maintained things, but because the reasons for being healthy were no longer staring you in the face, you let yourself go.
The people in my family (myself included) have a remarkable ability to overlook things that we don't want to deal with. We ignore messes as they accumulate, and we're lazy by nature. Unless we absolutely HAVE TO do something, we don't. Unless there's no way for us to avoid something, we'll make every effort to do just that.
This is something I'm becoming more aware of, as time goes by. I'm implementing systems (hey - it's what I do) in an effort to get things on track - to tidy and clean before things look like they have to be cleaned. My theory is that our house will then always look super clean and tidy, all the time. I know, I know, probably wishful thinking, but hey...a girl can dream, right? I need to work on taking away our ability to overlook things. Wish me luck!
A main deciding factor in this? The profile of the task. Is it something that is obvious? Will people notice if it isn't done? If so, can the fact that it isn't done be easily justified? If no one will notice, if it's easy to overlook, this is the sort of thing that can slip by the wayside from time to time.
The reality is that far too often, for most of us, we let things go until we just can't ignore, them anymore. There can be any multitude of reasons why we procrastinate: time, money and effort are the biggies.
Didn't get that "check engine" light on the dash checked out, now the car's making horrible noises and you can't wait any longer... would've been simpler, more convenient, and cheaper to take it to the shop before this point, but hey... human nature, right?
Didn't get the bathroom cleaned when it only needed a quick wipe... now you've got surprise guests and it needs to be scrubbed. Should've done it sooner, but because the mess wasn't staring you in the face, it was ignored, and now it's embarrassing.
Didn't exercise regularly because a look in the mirror told you that you looked okay - you didn't need to work out.... Now your muscles have gone soft, you've gained back a few pounds, and your clothes don't fit the same way. Should've maintained things, but because the reasons for being healthy were no longer staring you in the face, you let yourself go.
The people in my family (myself included) have a remarkable ability to overlook things that we don't want to deal with. We ignore messes as they accumulate, and we're lazy by nature. Unless we absolutely HAVE TO do something, we don't. Unless there's no way for us to avoid something, we'll make every effort to do just that.
This is something I'm becoming more aware of, as time goes by. I'm implementing systems (hey - it's what I do) in an effort to get things on track - to tidy and clean before things look like they have to be cleaned. My theory is that our house will then always look super clean and tidy, all the time. I know, I know, probably wishful thinking, but hey...a girl can dream, right? I need to work on taking away our ability to overlook things. Wish me luck!
Saturday, September 15, 2012
Inertia
I know what I need to do. I know why I need to do it. I want to get to the finish line, there's no doubt about that... so why don't I get started?
I need to make some changes. Some things I need to START doing, others I need to STOP doing. I've made some of these changes before, with positive results, but somehow drifted away from them... Some of them, on the other hand, are completely new and unfamiliar to me.
Taking on new challenges and making changes in life can be scary, and a big step, if you intend to commit to it before going in, which is what I do. If I don't intend to finish the race, I don't sign up for it. So before I take that first step, I need to be prepared for it... mentally, physically, and emotionally.
It's back to school time... I time to reinvent oneself, if you're so inclined. It's also a perfect time to develop new routines and new habits, despite what you may have been doing during the previous year, or over the course of the summer.
A body in motion, stays in motion, while a body at rest, stays at rest. So says Newton, anyway. Hoping I get this whole inertia thing taken care of real soon.
I need to make some changes. Some things I need to START doing, others I need to STOP doing. I've made some of these changes before, with positive results, but somehow drifted away from them... Some of them, on the other hand, are completely new and unfamiliar to me.
Taking on new challenges and making changes in life can be scary, and a big step, if you intend to commit to it before going in, which is what I do. If I don't intend to finish the race, I don't sign up for it. So before I take that first step, I need to be prepared for it... mentally, physically, and emotionally.
It's back to school time... I time to reinvent oneself, if you're so inclined. It's also a perfect time to develop new routines and new habits, despite what you may have been doing during the previous year, or over the course of the summer.
A body in motion, stays in motion, while a body at rest, stays at rest. So says Newton, anyway. Hoping I get this whole inertia thing taken care of real soon.
Sunday, September 9, 2012
What Next?
So... hubby's got a great new job lined up, as does his best friend and colleague from his previous business. Sounds all roses and sunshine, right? Just one little complication that needs to be considered and worked through first.
Transportation.
You see, both guys had driven company vehicles. All good in theory, at the time. Unfortunately, part of dissolving the company involves selling off the assets to cover the liabilities, hence - no more company vehicles. Realistically, though, as that had previously been their primary method of transportation for the last few years, it hadn't made sense to keep other personal vehicles, and pay insurance on it, etc.
How this impacts our current reality, is that he doesn't have a car to take him to his new job, and until he gets a couple of paycheques under his belt, no money to buy a new car. A Catch-22 situation, right?
The good news is that with some of his family vacationing this week, we're borrowing a vehicle that's available, and following that, my family's offered up the use of another vehicle for the following week. Sounds good in theory, but how far can you really take something like that? I mean, you don't want to take advantage of the situation and their generosity, but our dilemma is going to involve some creative transportation solutioning for a few weeks.
So I've been hitting the autotrader and similar sites, looking for something to carry us through. I've found a couple of vehicles with some fabulous potential, but they sound too good to be true, so the cynic in me is waiting for the catch, where they're concerned.
Hubby doesn't want to look at purchasing a car when we don't have any money or income (which sounds completely logical and reasonable) but I think this is truly one of those situations where we're going to have to spend money in order to make money. We'll see how this plays out. I don't know what will happen next... Time will tell.
Transportation.
You see, both guys had driven company vehicles. All good in theory, at the time. Unfortunately, part of dissolving the company involves selling off the assets to cover the liabilities, hence - no more company vehicles. Realistically, though, as that had previously been their primary method of transportation for the last few years, it hadn't made sense to keep other personal vehicles, and pay insurance on it, etc.
How this impacts our current reality, is that he doesn't have a car to take him to his new job, and until he gets a couple of paycheques under his belt, no money to buy a new car. A Catch-22 situation, right?
The good news is that with some of his family vacationing this week, we're borrowing a vehicle that's available, and following that, my family's offered up the use of another vehicle for the following week. Sounds good in theory, but how far can you really take something like that? I mean, you don't want to take advantage of the situation and their generosity, but our dilemma is going to involve some creative transportation solutioning for a few weeks.
So I've been hitting the autotrader and similar sites, looking for something to carry us through. I've found a couple of vehicles with some fabulous potential, but they sound too good to be true, so the cynic in me is waiting for the catch, where they're concerned.
Hubby doesn't want to look at purchasing a car when we don't have any money or income (which sounds completely logical and reasonable) but I think this is truly one of those situations where we're going to have to spend money in order to make money. We'll see how this plays out. I don't know what will happen next... Time will tell.
Saturday, September 8, 2012
Sigh
I know that I haven't posted much over the last couple of months. The simple fact is that I had a lot on the go - which isn't to say that I couldn't set aside 10 minutes of my precious time to post on my blog, but rather that I couldn't begin to sort it all out to even think of what to say.
I stopped working out. I had bought the Brazil Butt Lift DVD set, did it a couple of time, found it to be a fantastic workout, then stopped. My initial drop-off in my exercise regime happened when I hurt/broke my toe, and it really hurt to put any weight on it in my workouts. I didn't start back up again when I could have, though, as the weather heated up. We didn't have Air Conditioning and the conditions became unbearable when deliberate sweating was thrown into the mix.
My eating habits haven't been great. I will say, though, that I've become incredibly self-aware where food is concerned. I beginning to better understand what foods impact me in what ways, and even though I haven't lost any additional weight to reach my goal, I know what I need to do to continue to maintain my weight. For lack of a better term, I know how far I can push the limits of nutrition and indulgence, to enjoy some "forbidden" foods without completely derailing my efforts thus far.
Between these two things (the lack of exercise and less than stellar eating habits) I haven't felt very good about myself. I don't feel the pride that I did before. I know what I have to do, in order to get back on track, I just need to make the change, and do it. I'm hoping now that the kids are back to school that our family will start to find our way into some kind of a routine, and that the excercise can be incorporated into that routine.
My closed down his business. He's worked there for probably 10 years before he bought into it, so this was a major change, but a necessary one for a lot of reasons. He's supposed to be starting a new job early next week, though, so that'll be a good thing for everyone. It's a similiar sort of work to what he had done before, but this time he'll be working for someone else. The good side to this is that he doesn't have the responsibility and the headaches that come with being the owner of a business, and he gets a paycheque regardless of when/how much the client pays their bill. The down side to this is that he'll have to get used to answering to someone else, punching a timeclock (so to speak) and having to do thing someon else's way, whether or not he agrees with it. Wishing him lots of luck and hoping that this is the beginning of a great new stage in his life!
I've been feeling... unsettled, I guess would be the best way to describe it. Not quite anxious or stressed, for the most part, although I've had my fair share of both over the last couple of months. No, I guess it's a feeling of... waiting. Like I'm just holding my breath, watchful...waiting. I don't feel rested, and don't feel quite like myself. I wonder how much of this is related to the uncertainty that our family now faces with my husband's career change happening, how much may be because the summer simply flew by in a blur of baseball and soccer for the kids, and how much is because I'm just not taking care of myself and making me a priority.
In any event, these are some of the thoughts swirling through my head, and I don't yet have clarity or answers on any of these things. I don't fully understand my feelings about some of these things, and certainly haven't committed to any course of action to handle them. Perhaps that's why I'm feeling so unsettled... I usually have a clear vision of my path, and what I need to do to stay on it... and for the first time in awhile, I really and truly don't. I haven't made any decisions or plans about anything... I'm floating, waiting for a clearing to appear before me so that I can make a safe landing. Here's hoping I catch sight of one soon! In the meantime, I'll keep on looking and searching...
*Sigh*
I stopped working out. I had bought the Brazil Butt Lift DVD set, did it a couple of time, found it to be a fantastic workout, then stopped. My initial drop-off in my exercise regime happened when I hurt/broke my toe, and it really hurt to put any weight on it in my workouts. I didn't start back up again when I could have, though, as the weather heated up. We didn't have Air Conditioning and the conditions became unbearable when deliberate sweating was thrown into the mix.
My eating habits haven't been great. I will say, though, that I've become incredibly self-aware where food is concerned. I beginning to better understand what foods impact me in what ways, and even though I haven't lost any additional weight to reach my goal, I know what I need to do to continue to maintain my weight. For lack of a better term, I know how far I can push the limits of nutrition and indulgence, to enjoy some "forbidden" foods without completely derailing my efforts thus far.
Between these two things (the lack of exercise and less than stellar eating habits) I haven't felt very good about myself. I don't feel the pride that I did before. I know what I have to do, in order to get back on track, I just need to make the change, and do it. I'm hoping now that the kids are back to school that our family will start to find our way into some kind of a routine, and that the excercise can be incorporated into that routine.
My closed down his business. He's worked there for probably 10 years before he bought into it, so this was a major change, but a necessary one for a lot of reasons. He's supposed to be starting a new job early next week, though, so that'll be a good thing for everyone. It's a similiar sort of work to what he had done before, but this time he'll be working for someone else. The good side to this is that he doesn't have the responsibility and the headaches that come with being the owner of a business, and he gets a paycheque regardless of when/how much the client pays their bill. The down side to this is that he'll have to get used to answering to someone else, punching a timeclock (so to speak) and having to do thing someon else's way, whether or not he agrees with it. Wishing him lots of luck and hoping that this is the beginning of a great new stage in his life!
I've been feeling... unsettled, I guess would be the best way to describe it. Not quite anxious or stressed, for the most part, although I've had my fair share of both over the last couple of months. No, I guess it's a feeling of... waiting. Like I'm just holding my breath, watchful...waiting. I don't feel rested, and don't feel quite like myself. I wonder how much of this is related to the uncertainty that our family now faces with my husband's career change happening, how much may be because the summer simply flew by in a blur of baseball and soccer for the kids, and how much is because I'm just not taking care of myself and making me a priority.
In any event, these are some of the thoughts swirling through my head, and I don't yet have clarity or answers on any of these things. I don't fully understand my feelings about some of these things, and certainly haven't committed to any course of action to handle them. Perhaps that's why I'm feeling so unsettled... I usually have a clear vision of my path, and what I need to do to stay on it... and for the first time in awhile, I really and truly don't. I haven't made any decisions or plans about anything... I'm floating, waiting for a clearing to appear before me so that I can make a safe landing. Here's hoping I catch sight of one soon! In the meantime, I'll keep on looking and searching...
*Sigh*
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Irritable
I was irritable this afternoon.
I know myself well enough to know what my main triggers of stress/anxiety/irritability are...
There were some great sales in the area on school supplies we needed...unfortunately, most of the sales ended on Thursday, and I didn't get paid until Friday. What does that mean for us, in practical terms? Why was this a problem? Well, the bottom line is that it means I'm paying full price for everything, and it's all well and truly picked over, so we get very little in the way of selection.
Given that there were no good sales around our area, I figured we might try our luck in the states. After all, we made out well doing last-minute shopping at K-Mart last year, so why not give it another try? How about because there's a 53 minute wait at the Peace Bridge, 1hr 24 min at the Queenston-Lewiston Bridge, and a whopping 1 hr 42 min wait at the Rainbow Bridge! Well, I decide that if we were to head there anyway, we'd need to go to the bank first, so we head to the bank, and before changing the currency over, I check again. Now the shortest wait time is 59 minutes, and it's climbing. Change of plans - we're staying local.
We go to 2 stores, gradually crossing things from our list, and ultimately end up at Wal-Mart. The place is packed. There are too many people in the small back to school section, and someone in there reeks of BO. After juggling stacks of paper and locker accessories, Jillian tracks down a cart, and I dump our accumulated supplies in there with relief. But what's this? It doesn't seem to want to turn the corner... I'm struggling with the thing, and I realize that the right front wheel is seized. It's 1pm at this point, and several things on my "trigger" checklist are in play here... I'm hungry, it's crowded, our reality doesn't even remotely resemble my plans, and I'm feeling anxious because not only have I left everything so last minute, but no one has ANY DAMN REINFORCEMENTS!!
So my blood pressure is skyrocketing, and I can clearly visualize myself picking up the cart and throwing it through their front window/door. Not only can I picture this, but at the time, this seems to be to be a completely appropriate manner in which to handle the situation.
Needless to say, I half-wheeled, half-dragged our cart immediately to the checkout, and got the hell out of there, before things got out of control.
Back-to-school *sigh* It's that time of year again.
I know myself well enough to know what my main triggers of stress/anxiety/irritability are...
- disorganization
- derailing of plans
- running late
- having too much to do and not enough time in which to do it
- being out too late running errands with the kids, knowing that they should be in bed
- crowds of people
- being hungry
- general chaos
There were some great sales in the area on school supplies we needed...unfortunately, most of the sales ended on Thursday, and I didn't get paid until Friday. What does that mean for us, in practical terms? Why was this a problem? Well, the bottom line is that it means I'm paying full price for everything, and it's all well and truly picked over, so we get very little in the way of selection.
Given that there were no good sales around our area, I figured we might try our luck in the states. After all, we made out well doing last-minute shopping at K-Mart last year, so why not give it another try? How about because there's a 53 minute wait at the Peace Bridge, 1hr 24 min at the Queenston-Lewiston Bridge, and a whopping 1 hr 42 min wait at the Rainbow Bridge! Well, I decide that if we were to head there anyway, we'd need to go to the bank first, so we head to the bank, and before changing the currency over, I check again. Now the shortest wait time is 59 minutes, and it's climbing. Change of plans - we're staying local.
We go to 2 stores, gradually crossing things from our list, and ultimately end up at Wal-Mart. The place is packed. There are too many people in the small back to school section, and someone in there reeks of BO. After juggling stacks of paper and locker accessories, Jillian tracks down a cart, and I dump our accumulated supplies in there with relief. But what's this? It doesn't seem to want to turn the corner... I'm struggling with the thing, and I realize that the right front wheel is seized. It's 1pm at this point, and several things on my "trigger" checklist are in play here... I'm hungry, it's crowded, our reality doesn't even remotely resemble my plans, and I'm feeling anxious because not only have I left everything so last minute, but no one has ANY DAMN REINFORCEMENTS!!
So my blood pressure is skyrocketing, and I can clearly visualize myself picking up the cart and throwing it through their front window/door. Not only can I picture this, but at the time, this seems to be to be a completely appropriate manner in which to handle the situation.
Needless to say, I half-wheeled, half-dragged our cart immediately to the checkout, and got the hell out of there, before things got out of control.
Back-to-school *sigh* It's that time of year again.
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Planning
I'm a planner. I plan and organize things to death. Doing this satisfies my control-freak tendencies in a way that has minimal impact on others, and can be done discreetly.
I plan trips. Spending countless hours researching locations - everything about them - from temperature and climate info to cultural information and curreny, and everything in between. Once I decide on a location I like, I then switch my focus to accomodations - where should we stay? Independent hotel? Bed and Breakfast? Resort? Chain Hotel? Then there's the room itself... basic room with two smaller beds? Balcony? Mini-suite? Two-bedroom suite? On and on this goes, as I check out the attractions in the area and then determine the best way to get there. All this, and I haven't even considered when we might have the opportunity to go, or if we would even have the money to go. At the end of the day, though, I feel like I'm armed with information - and if/when the planets were to align, and I suddenly found myself with 10 days available and $2200 bucks, I would be able to jump into a car with a solid plan in place to have a fabulous trip at the drop of a hat.
Right - I know - like that's ever gonna happen. But still, I enjoy doing it. For awhile back in high school/college, I actually did co-ops in a couple of travel agencies. I had given some serious consideration to being a travel agent. I truly loved digging into things, pursuing resources to find the best possible deals to meet the criteria outlined for a given trip. The main reason I didn't go down that road was because I determined that the job didn't pay very well unless you owned your own travel agency, and as travel websites were popping up everywhere, the writing on the wall said that the demand for such businesses was decreasing by the day.
I think that trip planning serves a couple of purposes for me. I mentioned keeping my control-freak tendencies at bay, and that's likely a very real thing... but it also satisfies the dreamer in me. I can imagine a trip into existence... thinking about where I would go, and what I would do... by the time the last detail has been decided on, I feel like I've gone on the trip in my fantasy-land, and there's satisfaction in that. The plain and simple fact is that I'm a realist, most of the time.
I'm not going to get to go on all (or even most) of the trips I've planned. I don't get that much time off work, and I don't have that kind of money. In the meantime, though, I plan. I plan getaways and it makes me happy. If I'm really lucky, I get to actually go on one of those trips every once in awhile. And knowing that the people I love would love to go on the trips with me makes me happy, too.
Gotta go now - more planning to do :)
I plan trips. Spending countless hours researching locations - everything about them - from temperature and climate info to cultural information and curreny, and everything in between. Once I decide on a location I like, I then switch my focus to accomodations - where should we stay? Independent hotel? Bed and Breakfast? Resort? Chain Hotel? Then there's the room itself... basic room with two smaller beds? Balcony? Mini-suite? Two-bedroom suite? On and on this goes, as I check out the attractions in the area and then determine the best way to get there. All this, and I haven't even considered when we might have the opportunity to go, or if we would even have the money to go. At the end of the day, though, I feel like I'm armed with information - and if/when the planets were to align, and I suddenly found myself with 10 days available and $2200 bucks, I would be able to jump into a car with a solid plan in place to have a fabulous trip at the drop of a hat.
Right - I know - like that's ever gonna happen. But still, I enjoy doing it. For awhile back in high school/college, I actually did co-ops in a couple of travel agencies. I had given some serious consideration to being a travel agent. I truly loved digging into things, pursuing resources to find the best possible deals to meet the criteria outlined for a given trip. The main reason I didn't go down that road was because I determined that the job didn't pay very well unless you owned your own travel agency, and as travel websites were popping up everywhere, the writing on the wall said that the demand for such businesses was decreasing by the day.
I think that trip planning serves a couple of purposes for me. I mentioned keeping my control-freak tendencies at bay, and that's likely a very real thing... but it also satisfies the dreamer in me. I can imagine a trip into existence... thinking about where I would go, and what I would do... by the time the last detail has been decided on, I feel like I've gone on the trip in my fantasy-land, and there's satisfaction in that. The plain and simple fact is that I'm a realist, most of the time.
I'm not going to get to go on all (or even most) of the trips I've planned. I don't get that much time off work, and I don't have that kind of money. In the meantime, though, I plan. I plan getaways and it makes me happy. If I'm really lucky, I get to actually go on one of those trips every once in awhile. And knowing that the people I love would love to go on the trips with me makes me happy, too.
Gotta go now - more planning to do :)
Friday, July 20, 2012
Blessed - Part Four
Okay... so I'm going to bring this series to a close. Before I do, though, there's something on my mind that I need to acknowledge. It may seem arrogant, although I feel that it's simply worth mentioning.
I'm grateful for my strengths. My willpower, my compassion, my reasoning. My capacity to love, my ability to forgive, my willingness to reinvent myself, and to faciliate the same for those I love. I'm blessed that I'm a person who loves so many people, and who is, in turn, loved.
I'm grateful that I am able to dedicate myself to something, and that I have the strength to see things through, regardless of what curveballs life might decide to throw at me. I'm truly blessed to be me - I'm a lucky girl. :)
I'm grateful for my strengths. My willpower, my compassion, my reasoning. My capacity to love, my ability to forgive, my willingness to reinvent myself, and to faciliate the same for those I love. I'm blessed that I'm a person who loves so many people, and who is, in turn, loved.
I'm grateful that I am able to dedicate myself to something, and that I have the strength to see things through, regardless of what curveballs life might decide to throw at me. I'm truly blessed to be me - I'm a lucky girl. :)
Monday, July 9, 2012
Blessed - Part Three
I'm blessed to have a solid support system in my life - not everyone has that, and I never take it for granted.
My mom is the backbone of this support system. Now,back around Mother's Day, I recall posting about my mom - how amazing she is. I'll reiterate some of the highlights that make me grateful to have her in my life... Again - these are just some of the reasons - I couldn't possibly list them all, especially as new reasons surface all the time. My mom is the epitome of thoughtfulness. She always thinks about how a choice will impact others, and she factors that in to what she does. My mom recognizes when someone is in need of help, and offers it up whenever she can - before it's asked for. My mom is kind, and caring, and smart. She has so many skills and isn't afraid to try new things. She loves to learn and shares new tidbits of information with the people in her life that she feels might benefit from it. She's organized and prepared for anything and everything. She knows what she wants and what she doesn't want, and she isn't afraid to share her thoughts. She's honest and makes family her number one priority. Oh - and she put up with me throughout my teen years (no easy job, I assure you!). She's everything I could ever want in a mom, and everything my kids could ever want in a grandma.
As much as my job is a source of frustration for me at times, I'm know that I'm blessed to have a relatively well-paying and secure job in these tough economic times. I'm a financial analyst, and while I have a few years of experience under my belt, I don't have any fancy credentials or professional designations. Given this, I have a pretty good deal going where I am. I work through new challenges and problems in my own way, with little or no interference from management. I stretch my problem-solving muscles and challenge myself. I have some flexibility with work, both in hours and location. When I need to work from home, I have that option. If I need to start early or late, or end early or late, I can do that. As long as the work gets done in a timely fashion, I can do what I need to do. This is so important to me, as it means that I can achieve something resembling balance between my work and my personal life. Few people (unless they're self-employed) have that sort of flexibility, and I'm appreciative that I've got these options.
That's all I've got for today. As I work my way through these posts, I realize what a lucky girl I am. :)
My mom is the backbone of this support system. Now,back around Mother's Day, I recall posting about my mom - how amazing she is. I'll reiterate some of the highlights that make me grateful to have her in my life... Again - these are just some of the reasons - I couldn't possibly list them all, especially as new reasons surface all the time. My mom is the epitome of thoughtfulness. She always thinks about how a choice will impact others, and she factors that in to what she does. My mom recognizes when someone is in need of help, and offers it up whenever she can - before it's asked for. My mom is kind, and caring, and smart. She has so many skills and isn't afraid to try new things. She loves to learn and shares new tidbits of information with the people in her life that she feels might benefit from it. She's organized and prepared for anything and everything. She knows what she wants and what she doesn't want, and she isn't afraid to share her thoughts. She's honest and makes family her number one priority. Oh - and she put up with me throughout my teen years (no easy job, I assure you!). She's everything I could ever want in a mom, and everything my kids could ever want in a grandma.
As much as my job is a source of frustration for me at times, I'm know that I'm blessed to have a relatively well-paying and secure job in these tough economic times. I'm a financial analyst, and while I have a few years of experience under my belt, I don't have any fancy credentials or professional designations. Given this, I have a pretty good deal going where I am. I work through new challenges and problems in my own way, with little or no interference from management. I stretch my problem-solving muscles and challenge myself. I have some flexibility with work, both in hours and location. When I need to work from home, I have that option. If I need to start early or late, or end early or late, I can do that. As long as the work gets done in a timely fashion, I can do what I need to do. This is so important to me, as it means that I can achieve something resembling balance between my work and my personal life. Few people (unless they're self-employed) have that sort of flexibility, and I'm appreciative that I've got these options.
That's all I've got for today. As I work my way through these posts, I realize what a lucky girl I am. :)
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